Review: ‘The Witches’

Turning a cautionary tale into a campy comedy, director Robert Zemeckis’ The Witches is a lackluster Roald Dahl adaptation, but an amusing family adventure.

When Charlie is orphaned in a car crash, he is taken in by his calm, kindly grandmother (played by Octavia Spencer). Doing everything in her power to alleviate his grief, including providing him with a pet mouse, all seems to be going well until Charlie is offered a sweet in the grocery store by a sinister, strange lady. His grandmother reveals that it was, in fact, a witch, and tells him how to identify one. The two of them then leave their home in Alabama and make their way to the perceived safety of a grand hotel, only to find that a coven of witches, posing as a childrens charity and lead by Anne Hathaway‘s Grand High Witch, are meeting at the hotel to plan the demise of all children.

While the premise might sound frightening and Nicholas Roeg‘s previous adaptation is known for its’ scares and elaborate prosthetics, Zemeckis’ film notably takes the children’s horror element out of the story. Instead, it replaces it with an overall tongue-in-cheek tone, moments of comedy and campy, over-the-top performances. The Grand High Witch’s appearance is not grotesque, she is simply Anne Hathaway with shark-like teeth sharpened with CGI and otherwise basic Halloween makeup. Despite her Pennywise smile, the character is still far too pretty to be frightful. This feels like a disappointment, especially when there are aspects of the character, like her twisted, elongating arms, that could be truly horrifying if the film had aimed to be so.

A woman and her grandson talk to a man in a hotel lobby.
'The Witeches' (HBO Max)

Instead, what we get is a tongue-in-cheek, over-dramatic film filled with exaggerated performances from many cast members. Some of the witches are clearly hamming it up as much as possible, but no-one in this cast could outdo Anne Hathaway. This is purely because she seems to be having a lot of fun going so over-the-top. She gives the role buckets of dramatic flair, both in terms of her physical performance made up of grand flourishes, and her corny, stereotypically evil Russian-esque accent.

In comparison, the talents of Stanley Tucci are completely wasted as hotel manager Mr Stringer. He gets very little screen time and, with the exception of one scene where he gets to clown around with everyone else, is generally quite a straight-laced, comparatively dull character. Octavia Spencer is the only other cast member in the film who gets to act in a calm manner, but this isn’t a disparaging comment towards her role as the grandmother. If anything, Spencer’s calm, comforting presence in a film full of zany performances helps to ground the film and provide a sense of normality despite the dramatic events occurring around her.

For a story that, on paper, sounds rather sinister, it feels a bit strange that the tone of the film is so consistently upbeat and humourous. Early on, when Charlie’s grandmother is telling him a story about her own experience with witches, there is an attempt to make them seem sinister and scary. As she realises the seriousness of the situation and begins to pack up their things to move to the hotel there is an undercurrent of threat. Unfortunately as soon as they arrive at the hotel any tension there may have been dissipates, only to be replaced with constant dramatic shenanigans. As a result, there is no sense of threat from the coven of witches gathered at the hotel. Charlie and his grandmother have jumped from the frying pan into the fire, but the film downplays the level of danger they’re in in favour of focusing on their fun attempts to foil the witches’ plans.

This isn’t entirely a bad thing. The protagonists might not seem to be in any real danger, but at least the shenanigans they get into are exciting and amusing. In this way the film has a real sense of fun and chooses, quite successfully, to focus on that. There isn’t a single dull moment in the films’ brisk runtime (thankfully Zemeckis didn’t fall into the trap of extending the film to two hours and beyond). The only time the film outstays its’ welcome is during a strange, ill-fitting mid-credits scene that feels distinctly out of place and unnecessary.

This film might not be creepy or serve as a cautionary tale, but it provides an unexpected amount of fun and adventure, and refuses to shy away from being over-the-top and cheesy. The nonthreatening nature of the witches seems like a missed opportunity, but the cast are clearly having a lot of fun and it’s hard not to have fun watching them. – Lauren Miles

Rating: 3/5

The Witches is out now on HBO Max in the US, and on digital platforms in the UK.